On board the “Green Goddess” during the 1964 Autumn Mediterranean Cruise, there was a crew magazine produced on 10 pages of typed and duplicated foolscap paper. This page is a more pieces written for issue No.3 of this magazine.
As mentioned on the introductory page, it's not my intention to transcribe the entire document. Only selected articles will appear here.
Timidly submitted to the Editor of Horizon
A trip to this delightful spot is strongly recommended to all. It is most pleasant and instructive an experience once one is familiar with the customs of the place and its natives.
Caronia is surrounded on all sides by water. It consists of an Upper Altitude, (where the atmosphere is distinctly chilly) and Lower Depths, where it is warmer. The natives of Upper Caronia are afflicted with what is known as British Reserve, which accounts in part for the distinct chill in the air.
A note should be added here: Most would profit from a large dose of this affliction, if affliction it is. The natives of Lower Caronia are filled with the milk of Human Kindness, a great solace to the timid and homesick.
A vast amount of luggage is required for this safari, due to the custom of the country known as “Dressing Elegantly for Dinner”. Furs are in order, and this gives an appearance of a swarm of fur-bearing beetles.
The climate of the Caronia is governed by a phenomenon known as “Air Conditioning”. This means that when it is warm outside, the air-conditioning is turned off, so that it is warm inside too. And when it is cold outside, the air-conditioning is turned on, so that it is cold inside too, even if Madam turns blue, furs and all!
However, do not let me give a false impression. It is a jolly place, filled with Strolling Minstrels and elegant balls with gay decorations - and really the natives are wonderful!
So, Here's to the Caronia!
Long may she sail
O'er the home of the tunny
And haunt of the Whale!
And, Here's to her Captain!
So brave and so true
And Here, by all means, is
Three Cheers to the Crew!
K. Wharton.
I haven't been able to establish who Miss Katherine K. Wharton was. If anyone can advise, please do.
Look, why?
I do not know
My mind is made up
Forever love is always
and I but long
to live and feel it
And again do not
like abruptness as
Sweetness
John's former verse is likened by a Bridge Officer to Yeats. Owing to “the Prof's” first article on culture (which was previewed by the crew) there has been an outcry for a poem by Yeats to compare with John's latest effort.
Note however, the quaint spelling of Abruptness, could John be starting a new trend in vocabulary? Could be. -- “The Editor”
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Page last updated on Thu, 27 Mar 2025
